Moving on ... Part 2 (Holding things lightly !)
This blog picks up where the last one left off. A quick recap of part 1 – my husband (Neil) and I, having decided to split up, were living in the same home. Amicably and often very enjoyably but with multiple challenges!
This next bit moves on to the “leaving home” bit. The main feature that runs through this period is the absolute need to hold things lightly. Uncertainty abounds!
Holding things lightly!
Well, this is something I’ve been saying for years and partially doing! It’s something I totally believe in but for some reason it hasn’t always panned out that way.
Over the last year though it is definitely a skill that has been developing. My interpretation of holding something lightly is finding that balance between identifying what you want, going after it, yet accepting that if it doesn’t happen then that’s ok. It’s taking that opportunity to reassess and look at other opportunities that may be just as good or even better when plan A (B, C or D) doesn’t work out! It doesn’t mean not caring, rather willing to accept that things can and probably will change. When we bend, like a blade of grass in the wind, we can spring back up.
That’s the theory anyway!
Sounds easy but the practical reality is often more messy, tricky and pretty emotional. The decision for my daughter and I to move to Edinburgh came about after a number of twists and turns.
During the pandemic my work had shifted mostly online, which actually allows numerous opportunities when it comes to being able to relocate. As long as there is good digital connectivity then you can pretty much go there. One reason why I have been keen to move is to a warmer environment. When I first came to the Highlands I didn’t even notice the weather. I loved the seasons, coped with the cold and the general gorgeousness of the place just trumped any pitfalls of the harsh winters. However, 10 years ago I was diagnosed with an underactive thyroid which made me feel cold MOST of the time. My puffer jacket was such a blessing but that old saying “There’s no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothing” didn’t seem to apply to me. 😆
Throughout the varying lockdown and releases my daughter had been able to continue doing her favourite activity, basketball, albeit outdoors and frequently alone. This cemented in her mind that as soon as it was possible, she’d want to take this passion further. As a family we began to consider options. We looked down all sorts of avenues. It was not only the pandemic that threw up barriers but also the effect of Brexit and the lack of free movement!
After a bunch of discussions and a few trips to the capital she got an offer to train with a brilliant club in Edinburgh. Hooray, we could move south – I know, you’re probably thinking that Edinburgh is not exactly the southern move I was thinking of when I was looking for extra warmth and sunshine but every degree counts ey. 😆
To make this move we needed initially to find the basics -somewhere to live and a new school. I had definitely expected this to be way easier than it was. On the education front we quickly established that the schools around here are very full. And none of them want to liaise with you until you’ve moved here (With proof!)
Despite the fact that a huge proportion of students attend private schools in the capital (In 2009 it was 25% compared to a UK average of 7%!) there still seems to not be enough spaces. Trying to work out where she might possibly